Broke trust in two//Now no one's looking out for you

It's surprisingly easy to get caught up in the little things...

There only has to be one thing that nags us incessently,

to completely shove the bigger picture out of focus.

Just one little tiny thing.

I like to think that I don't let the little things get to me
and sometimes I have to give myself the extra fortification to steel myself...

I really wonder why it is the stupid stuff that seems to turn us all into emotional wrecks
(myself included)
I'm not saying the big things don't upset us, but it seems to me, that the things that tend to upset me (and my friends and family) the most are tiny, itty bitty, nit picky things.
Things that, I'm sure, if we were living in a war-torn third world country,
we wouldnt be all to concerned with.

AIM is most certainly going to become the bain of my existance. I don't understand how I am going to wean myself from this as I grow older.
I started this blog at like...4 and its almost 5 because I was so busy AIMing away...those blinking lights are a bit obsessive. I honestly can see myself as the mother of two and yelling at them to be quiet because I can't read my IM's. How sad how obs

Do you sometimes find that silence can be welcome and unwelcome at the same time?

Like with my friend A, who I can most certainly call one of my best friends...I don't ever find our silences to be daunting or unwelcome. In fact, I find it utterly soothing to just be able to not have to fill our silences with idle chatter. I can sit with A for hours on end and not have to say a word. And at the same time, A and I can talk about any subject endlessly. In fact, I have to say, that since the first day I met A, no silence has been unwelcome, and neither has any conversation we have had.
In reference to A:

She understood my wonders,
And listened to my dreams.
She listened to how I felt about life and love,
And knew what it all means.

And thanks to A, I was introduced to another friend that I value. H.
H is a pretty groovy kid, and I am going to get BEAT for saying this, but damnit..I can't seem to shut up around this kid. With H, silence is akward. Maybe its only akward because we are always talking about something, and H is the kind of person that is constantly on the go. Not that it's a bad thing. It always seems that whenever a silence emerges, it is immediatly and effectivly squashed by some form a conversation, and when silence does rein, it is filled with dramatic tension like things.
Word to your ammi, H.



Until we meet again, I leave you with my latest musical obsession.




All your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down
Oh all your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down
She's just like you
So why keep doing what you do
Why cut a friend
Why cruise that mean lean to an end
You could have heel toed
To another place
You could have peeled slow
To a better face

But your heart can't grieve
For your little dreams
Oh no your heart can't grieve
Not for your little dreams

All your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down
All your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down

Broke trust in two
Now no one's looking out for you
Why keep it cruel
Why waste so much to play the fool

And maybe I'm the fool but I think we'd find
That we could all be so so kind
If you'd just leave your tread mill powertrip behind
Oh leave your treadmill powertrip behind
And maybe it's best that you're so so blind
It's best that your so so blind
Because your heart can't grieve
I know your heart can't grieve

I know your heart can't grieve
What your eyes won't see
But you were my favorite moment
Of our dead century

I know your heart can't grieve
What your eyes won't see
But you were my favorite moment
Of our dead century

But all your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down
Oh all your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down

Oh warfarin' terrapin
Unconfined undesigned
Undersigned bantering
Bartering bellowing
Barracking blundering
Pillaging plundering
Living and lavishing
Hammerings harrowing
Flourishing flattening
Levelling reveling
Wrecking and ravaging
Savoring savaging

Oh warfarrin terrapin
Unconfined undesigned
You've got me worried and wondering

All your dreams are over now
And all your wings have fallen down
All your dreams are over now

-"Dreams" by TV on the Radio

ps: embrace the emotions.